The Elusive INFJ

They’ve been called a lot of things: The Unicorn, The Special Snowflake, The Oracle, The Protector, The Physic, The Counselor. But whatever you want to call the rarest 1% of the population, it’s hard to deny that they’re the most elusive type among us. In fact, it’s a fairly safe bet to assume that no one is actually an INFJ but in their own deluded, self-aggrandizing minds. MBTI buffs, particularly of the NF variety, love to self-efface from the vague descriptions online and wave the INFJ flag. That’s precisely why, whenever someone who is unfamiliar with the MBTI tool and cognitive functions takes the test in front of me and gets the INFJ result, I take astute interest in them.

Would you like a cookie?

Would you like a cookie?

Are you actually an INFP?

The thing I always want to know first is ‘Are you actually an INFP?’. Why? Because INFPs frequently mistakes themselves for an INFJ. First of all, INFJs and INFPs are really, really similar in appearance and by appearance, I mean they take on the same mannerisms, tend to behave the same ways, and reach the same conclusions. They’re also the two most frequently misunderstood NFs (Introverted Feelers). The reason why is a bit complicated and has a lot to do with how cognitive functions work. Without getting into the boring details, INFPs (understandably) mistake the fact they lead with a Judging function (Fi) with being a Judging type. This isn’t the case, however, for reasons which are even more complicated and involved and I don’t care to make your eyes cross by getting into the mumbo jumbo of how functions work together. If you really want to know what the difference is between INFJ and INFP, it’s discussed in great length here. If you’re still confused, this test will give you a better clue if you’re torn between the two.

INFJs Are Not Who You Think They Are

It’s true. They’re social chameleons, like Mystique from X-Men, they can observe and take on the shape and form (behaviors and mannerisms) of any other type. At work, INFJs may look like INTPs (laid back geniuses) and socially, they may resemble ENFPs (charismatic idealists) or ESFJs (social organizers). Actually, they can seem like any type, depending on which side of their multi-faceted, multi-layered personality they want to show you in whichever social context you happen to be in. You may even think an INFJ is your type, since they like to frequently use the social tool called ‘mirroring’, which is basically observing and copying your mannerisms in order to gain rapport with you. For this reason and a lot of others, INFJs are notoriously difficult to type. The only sure way to know is to have someone take the test and confirm that they are an INFJ. You will be surprised to find who is actually an INFJ. I like to think that I know people pretty well and I still tend to miss identifying true INFJs.

INFJs Can Predict The Future

Well…kind of. Actually, it’s that they lead with the most mysterious function, Ni (Introverted Intuition) which is able to instantly make connections; both past, present and use them to establish patterns, which will produce knowledge of the most likely outcomes. INTJs also have this ability but in a different context. For those of you who play video games, it’s kind of like this: two classes may have the same abilities (for example, close combat melee weapons) but one class masters dueling swords while the other uses a broadsword. That’s kind of how cognitive functions work for types: INFJs and INTJs both use instant connections to establish patterns and determine likely outcomes..but the INFJ is an expert in determining what people will do whereas INTJs are better at determining what logical events will happen.

If you want to know, at any given point, what a person will likely do when put into X situation, ask an INFJ. They will be right about 97% of the time. That’s because INFJs understand people almost instantly and on the deepest level you can conceive. INFJs build a multi-layered, subconscious profile on everyone that comes into contact with them. This ‘profile’ is not something consciously done or even understood by the INFJ but rather, it’s a function which operates in an automated way: kind of like your body’s circulatory, limbic, and metabolic systems. You don’t have to tell your body to breathe. It just does. So it is with INFJs and their people-related connections. They just know people, inside and out and since events are often caused by or related to human behavior in some way, INFJs often give the impression that they can predict events like an INTJ. Remove the human element from the equation however, and you’ll find that INFJs are less adept at this particular brand of foreboding. Now, this isn’t a good thing or a bad thing. I’ll use the analogy of a video game, specifically a Role Playing Game. If the task or duty at hand requires you to the desired knowledge or reaction out of other players or NPCs, then you would want to switch your character into the INFJ class. If the task or duty involves understanding non-human systems (engineering or IT comes to mind), then you’ll want to switch your character into the INTJ class. Both classes can do each other’s jobs with relative efficiency but if you want the extra advantage, you’ll want the class that specializes in one or the other.

Really, I just needed an excuse to show off my Summoner pet

Really, I just needed an excuse to show off my Summoner pet

INFJs are Psychic

Again…only kind of.There’s a good reason INFJs are frequently appointed in tribes throughout history and around the world as the Shaman or the Healer. In modern, western civilization, INFJs often work as counselors, therapists, coaches, and other occupations which serve as the go-to person for a wide variety of human problems. INFJs are basically emotional sponges.What does that mean exactly? Well, a lot of types can develop abilities which center around reading body language and listening for inflections in tone and manners in speech. NF empaths, in particular, are sensitive to the emotions of others and have the ability to cross-reference their own to correctly identify emotions (like INFPs do). INFJs, however, are by far the most natural at this. They are literally like a sponge. They absorb the emotions of others in their raw state in real time. This ability is vastly different than that of the INFP, which can only make self-effaced (albeit highly accurate) guesses. INFJs literally feel what you feel and they feel it exactly at the moment that you’re feeling it and most shockingly, sometimes even before you know you’re feeling it. The reason is a unique combination of Dominant Ni and Auxillary Fe (Extraverted Feeling). It’s the perfect storm of functions which allows INFJs to ‘take the emotional temperature’ of others and use Ni pattern recognition to correctly identify their emotional state and respond accordingly.

Another reason INFJs seem to be psychic is that they are simply better listeners. Yes, I’m generalizing here but it’s true. INFJs are the best listeners. The reason, again, is explained by having Ni as a dominant function. Ni is a perceiving function which takes in information. It’s primarily an input system rather than an output system. Because of this, INFJs often seem passive and non-reactive. They are constantly observing and listening, generally responding with open-ended questions, reflective dialogue, and only answering questions when directly asked. Any counselor or therapist worth their salt will tell you the value of ‘reflecting’ another person’s feelings and information back to them. Conversations with INFJs are often one-sided and peppered with frequent bits of validation like “I see how you could feel that way” or “That must have been really hard for you” or the classic “Tell me more.” INFJs are focused on you and want to know more about you. You’ll learn a lot more about other people if you ask to listen and more importantly, to understand. Most types struggle to listen to truly understand. It’s a self-absorbed world out there; with everyone clamoring over each other to get a word in, talking over each other, or simply just waiting for their turn to speak. With everyone focused in on themselves, it’s little wonder why INFJs have more knowledge of what’s going on than everyone else. As far as I know, that’s not a psychic phenomenon so much as just simple logic. Not to say that INFJs couldn’t be psychic, I’m sure a lot of them are…but that’s on a whole other level.

INFJs are Nice

Mahatma-Gandhi-Action-Quotes

This leads me to the next generalization that I’m going to boldly make. INFJs are nice..generally speaking. There’s really two levels to this: individual and global idealism. On an individual level, I just explained that INFJs are basically emotional vampires who absorb the emotions of others. I can’t emphasize that enough, since it actually means that your emotions literally become their own. In other words, if an INFJ hurts you, they’re also hurting themselves…so they’re going to do everything they can to avoid hurting you. This is how INFJs got the label ‘Protectors’ since they protect the hell out of your feelings. INFJs are also highly driven by the motive to ‘help’ others, often rescuing disenfranchised souls and homeless animals. That cliche novel or movie about a perfectly well-adjusted guy bringing home a hooker to give her a hot meal, a safe place to sleep, and attempting to help her get out of the life on the streets…that’s about an INFJ.

Perhaps even more important is the concept of global idealism, which INFJs, and NFs in general, are famous for. INFJs truly do want to make the world a better place for people (and/or other living things). This global outreach entails an inner value system with its own set of rules which are prioritized from the core (most important) and taper out to lesser values (less important). An INFJ’s inner value system is a paradox to their seemingly passive, gentle, observant nature because it is rigid, adamant, and possesses the highest standards for what an individual INFJ considers ‘moral’. INFJs, generally speaking, are primarily concerned with one thing: doing the right thing. It’s their modus operandi. It’s their prime directive, if you will (Star Trek fans, anyone?). It’s the secret ingredient of the INFJ’s personality makeup and it completely explains why they lack ego, balk at superficiality, act with caution, and getting back to the subject at hand…that’s also why they’re nice.

INFJs are Assholes

adolf-hitler

This is also true. In fairness, all types are assholes and some just have a series of personal habits which create a combined sum of excessive assholerly. But allow me to clarify that I just mean that when an INFJ decides to be an asshole, this is the particular way he/she goes about it:

For the very same reason INFJs are nice, they’re also assholes. They know everything about you (with a positive inflection) and they know everything about you (negative inflection). That can be a bad thing. Imagine if everything an INFJ has on you (which is a lot) were to be used to turn the tables on you. It can happen..and it does. INFJs are plenty assertive when they need to be. The following is a list of things sure to piss off an INFJ:

  1. Bullying/being mean to someone they care about. – The other reason INFJs are called “protectors”. If you’re going to be cruel, thoughtless, or unfair towards someone that an INFJ really cares about, you’re going to have a bad time.
  2. Dishonesty – INFJs fucking hate liars. It’s really best to be honest with an INFJ..since they know the truth, anyway. In fact, if you do lie, they’ll let you keep speaking just to see how far you’re willing to go with it. Also, being vague and/or short with your responses or omitting pertinent information is tantamount to lying to an INFJ since the motive is deception.

An honorable mention is superficiality, which is really more of a pet peeve or an annoyance than an actual trigger. Aside from that, violating personal boundaries or values will put you on the shit list. But since they’re too individualistic, I’m not going to try to list them here. So what happens when you make an INFJ mad? Well, of course, there’s a spectrum of reactions which are unique to the situation and I’ll attempt to categorize them according to anecdotal information I’ve acquired from several dozen INFJs:

  1. The Door Close – This happens for various reasons. It could mean an offended INFJ or perhaps just an exhausted/conflicted INFJ. This is when they unceremoniously place a lot of emotional/physical/psychological distance between you and them. Also known as the ‘Door Slightly Ajar’ or the ‘Door Gently Closed’.
  2. The Door Slam – The infamous INFJ door slam is when you’ve been shut out completely from existence, often without explanation.
  3. The Button Pushing/Door Slam – Rarely used. When an INFJ becomes infuriated and spiteful and decides to draw upon their vast expanse of knowledge of all your deepest, darkest insecurities and use them against you with deadly precision. They use Tertiary Ti (Introverted Thinking) to locate the exact, right words to say and the exact, right things to do/not do which will hurt you the most. Usually followed by the door slam. Always highly regretted maneuver.
  4. The Quietly Judgmental Detective – Asking open-ended questions to determine if you’re lying and if so, just how bad of a lying sack of shit you are. Usually accompanied by laser death eyes and a surly, judgmental look.
  5. The Disappointed Mother/Father – Guaranteed to make you feel like shit. This is what happens when you disappoint the person you really like and admire. INFJs are really good at letting you know that they think just a little less of you..and that’s so much worse than anger.

INFJs Are Complicated

If you like human puzzles, INFJs are right up your alley. Remember that emotional sponge thing I mentioned earlier? Imagine having that ability and not being able to turn it off. There is no on and off switch for being absorbent. This is why warm-hearted, sincerely interested INFJs suddenly withdraw from you without explanation. For them, it can be exhausting to be around other people. The only way to truly escape inheriting the emotions of others is to get away from people entirely, which explains the beguiling push-pull behavior. INFJs are hot and cold, never seeming to approach you in the same, exact way twice. At their core, INFJs yearn to be around other people, to be understood, and appreciated. But they also shoulder the responsibility/burden of caring about all the souls they encounter and always doing the right thing. It’s the weight of the world, resulting a low-level baseline of stress that is omnipresent, only to be temporarily relieved by solitary processing or true understanding by another.

INFJs Are Deep and Sensitive

Probably my favorite thing about INFJs; they’re deep. There’s no discussion too deep for an INFJ and no judgment passed if you’d rather be discussing the meaning of life than the caloric content of your lunch. INFJs are all about emotional connection and the meaningful exchange of ideas. Most significantly, INFJs crave the deepest connection with someone that can possibly be attained. INFJs learn at a young age what most people start realizing much later on, which is that its better to have a few quality relationships in life than a large quantity of casual acquaintances and fair weather friends. Despite being naturally popular people, INFJs don’t crave or seek attention from the masses. Depth can only be established one on one and each relationship is seen as a large emotional investment to be taken seriously.

The inner world of an INFJ is sentimental, poetic, and highly idealistic, no matter how he/she appears to be from the outside. There’s a innate sense of self-preservation and secretiveness that is associated with the type, since they’re highly sensitive to mockery and rejection. INFJs don’t share unless they know for sure that you aren’t going to hurt them. Their own personal feelings, which so rarely see the light of day, are deep and intense that if they were entrusted with the wrong person, it would be devastating. I vaguely recall a quote that someone said (and I’m probably butchering this quote) “If you want to know how someone wants to be loved, observe the way they choose to love others”. I believe that to be true for INFJs as well. Somewhere, deep down inside, they wish someone would do for them the same that they constantly do for the rest of the world.

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107 Comments

  1. Thank you for this rich and deeply comprehensive description of the INFJ personality; I really enjoyed reading it.

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  2. Wonderful article on the INFJ personality type. I did take that “Are you an INFP or INFJ?” test, just out of curiosity, and got 71% INFJ. I might start pointing people toward this test when they ask how to clarify their type.

    Thank you for mentioning our “scary” side as well as the more positive and “mystical” aspects of our type. I was ready to do a full “Button Pushing/Door Slam” on someone the other day after receiving a brokenhearted e-mail from a friend. Thankfully, the guy who upset her wasn’t around me at the time. I’ve since calmed down to the “Disappointed Mother” phase.

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  3. Thanks for the test within the article, you know we love to KNOW that we are INFJ! ;p
    Loved the piece itself, so spot on and it’s nice to feel like someone gets “me”. Have a great day!

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  4. Thank you for this article. Being an infj, growing up was a bit of the challenge for me, I felt different and misunderstood all the time. But now when I’m a bit older and I’ve done a lot of introspection I finally feel comfortable in my own skin and I just accepted the fact that I have a rare personality type which, like the most of infjs, I like. But, it would be much easier for me, if I knew all these things when I was younger. This article is a hundred percent accurate for me, you have done a wonderful job. I wish you all the best 🙂

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  5. Enjoyed the post the last paragraph really resonated with me. Especially the last 3 sentences. I got 53% infp an 47% infj I’m lol I feel like I’m an inch the first time I took the test in college I was infj.. I have gotten isfj before when attempting to take the test later in life… Sometimes I think I am loosing my infjness(i know that’s not a thing) lol somehow I’m trying to desperately hold on to the fact that I am a infj I jus relate to the articles so much . keep up the good work bro

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    1. It’s a very nice article about the INFJ personality that I surely will reread again.
      I also tried the test between INFJ and INFP, and I find it a not so good tool for distinction. The reason why, is that anyone who’s read a lot about the INFJ and INFP type in most cases already knows which answer leads to which result, and people are prone to deluding themselves. Despite knowing that, I tried to the best of my ability to give the answers according to what I know about myself. The result is funny because it came out 53% INFJ and 47% INFP. But it’s not unexpected since in some cases it was hard to discern which answer appertained just a tiny bit more to myself than the other.

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      1. Ah! The same that I think. The options very clearly led to the particular types for anyone who has done some research on them. I tried my best to be completely honest and I got 53% INFJ and 47% INFP as well haha.

  6. At the risk of developing an overblown ego,I thank you for helping me understand myself.
    All my life I have had this ability to KNOW what was really going on under the surface of people’s social mask but until my older INFP/J friend told me about the Test,I was unaware that few people could.I am constantly fine tuning that knowledge because even the most savvy INFJs can be taken by malignant relationship con artists.After my horrible experience from five years ago I am happy to announce that my bullshit/con artist/manipulator antennas are permanently up and working fine.

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    1. Cindy,

      I am THRILLED to hear that! Just my humble thoughts, love can be blinding for even the most astute among us. It’s best to think it through and proceed with cautious optimism.

      Thank you also for the probably the greatest compliment a person could get ever give me. Even just the thought that I potentially helped you makes me very happy. My hope is that I’m not so much giving you my own ideas as I am just reflecting what you already know on the inside. Take care and thank you for reading.

      Becky

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    2. I just had a similar experience—this write up deepened my own understanding of my quirky “differences” which at times are liabilities (most often are not) and definitely mystify or inspire those around me.

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  7. Took a test as part of the application for my Masters degree in September. Came back as INFJ. The last few hours I’ve been doing some casual reading around it, I thought I was doing a standard psychometric test so MBTI is a revelation to me. I’m an advocate for a national mental health charity and people who know me are always amazed at how confident and fearless I am at speaking out for my clients rights but how quiet and anti-social I can be personally, so it all kinda fits, much more than I would have expected to be honest. I’m actually a bit relieved that this bipolar part of my personality is ‘a thing’ although I am a bit worried that MBTI personality types are often written up like horoscopes, and not very convincing. Is there a definitive site or book I can consult on the subject until I get access to the university library again. And without wanting to appear rude, what is your background? Great article, I just wondered if it’s based on an academic interest or if it’s simply a fun, knowledgable, vanity piece. As for the rarity of this particular MBTI type, it’s just a few letters. If I am rare, I hope it’s because of the work I do, the difference I make and the amount I actually give a shite – not just because I ticked the right boxes.

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    1. Karen,

      First off, thank you for reading. I want to say that I completely agree with your assertion that rarity in personality has more to do with one’s attitude, ambition, and efforts. In other words, personal choices are far more important than any cognitive preference or personality leanings. You can have a proclivity for one thing or the other but what you choose to do with it says more about your character.

      MBTI isn’t an exact science and from what I understand, it’s more frequently used in business HR than psychology however MBTI has its roots in The works of Carl Jung, who wasn’t the first person to be fascinated by the human personality but certainly went into far more detail with it than anyone has before or since.

      According to Jungian theory, personality is made up of the frequency of use of specific cognitive functions. In order to understand MBTI, you have to understand the functions themselves. Jung said many times that everyone uses all functions at times, however we’ve developed preferences which are shaped by both nurture and nature. There’s more info here http://www.cognitiveprocesses.com/Cognitive-Functions/.

      As for my background, I don’t have a background in psychology, just a bit of experience working in long term residential treatment and a peculiar obsession with people and typology. I would take anything I said with a grain of salt for sure since I don’t speak with the authority of Ethos. I just read and observe a lot. I see the truth as being fluid and three dimensional so I hope my readers don’t interpret this as concrete, formulaic truth. Remember that each person is unique and this is just one aspect of many which makes the human animal so complex and interesting.

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    2. Hope you don’t mind me just jumping in here, but since you asked about books, Karen, I recommend reading Isabel Myers’s “Gifts Differing.” She’s the one who came up with the MBTI, and it’s her book explaining the test and the research that went into it. David Keirsy’s “Please Understand Me II” is another good book which is often referenced in MBTI discussions.

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  8. You are describing an INFJ 4w5, not an INFJ 4w3.
    INFJ 4w3 are more extroverted, talk more about themselves, have more ego, are more willing to do the wrong thing/cut corners for success. They are more clouded by their feeling/idealization of others/how they want others to be, which weakens their intuition about people, although Ni is still very high. Higher Fe = more emotionally volatile and prone to outwardly express their judgements. More self-centered and thus less perceptive and reactive to others’ needs moment by moment.
    More fun, witty, charming, outwardly loving in group settings in my experience. Seek fame more and are restless when they do not find it. Less organized, spend more time dreaming about success, but very driven and goal focussed at the same time. Less 5ish knowledge about the world, but still very interested in global issues and making the world a better place.
    I’m an INFJ 4w3

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    1. YOU JUST PUT MY STRUGGLE INTO WORDS. I consistently test INFJ, but some of the descriptions never sounded 100% like me. I’m sure it doesn’t help that I just tested 53% INFJ-47% INFP (What can I say? I love fiction!).
      I think I lost a lot of that “emotional sponge” function being raised in an emotionally toxic household. I had to withdraw out of sheer survival, and on top of that I spent about a third of my life in deep depression, which is really isolating. I’m definitely out of practice.
      I constantly measure people up against their potential — or wasted potential. I never make judgmental conclusions about it, though, because I pride myself on being emotionally safe and non-judgmental (in other words, Christlike) in that way.
      Plus, I want to be a famous novelist to boot! I’m constantly daydreaming about it.
      My room is a total mess, too! I daydream about organization.

      Now I know!! Thank you! Could you please explain the significance of the numbers and what the term “4w3” means?

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      1. I’m no expert on Enneagram but I believe type 4s are individualists who pride themselves on their unique nature. There’s a sort of artistic and otherworldly characteristic of type 4s.

        There’s plenty of great websites on the subject. Thanks for reading!

    2. Thank you for this! I have wondered about some of my quirks. makes sense now! Janel, I am with you there. It is amazing what we become to compensate for our surroundings.

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    3. Hello Reeva, can your share your source on the infj subtypes, its the first time I hear of the 4w3 & 4w5….I would like to find out more….

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  9. Can’t edit my comment 😉 I wanted to add that your description of INFJs is pretty awesome overall. Lot’s of truth in there for me as an INFJ 4w3, enjoyed reading it. Differences between INFJ 4w5 / 4w3 are just my humble opinion.

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  10. Oh my gosh, I am a master at “Disappointed Mother” and “Quietly Judgmental Detective” is a close second. I literally LOL’ed when I read that. So accurate. Do any other INJF consciously choose to use their powers for good, or am I the only one who frequently has that thought

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  11. Just finished reading the article and am sooo giddy because I’m an INFJ and an INFP best friend. I’m glad to confirm for real that I’m an INFJ. I’ve been so confused because I can relate to both types. Thank you very much for writing this article, it was very insightful and true. Also, I’m so happy to see so many INFJs in the comments section.

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  12. As I was reading, I was intrigued/having ‘Oh I get it now’ moments/extremely giddy! I’m so glad someone explained all the traits of an INFJ in a way that was informative, logical and detailed. Also loved the RPG comparisons to the actual two types. And I’m so happy to see so many INFJs in the comments section 🙂

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  13. Your words are so real to me. This piece really helps me to feel at peace with who I am. This piece adds value to my “weirdness.” It’s like a distinction. Where can I read more of your writing?

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  14. Recently I have been trying to find answers for why I am the way I am. Clearly I have always been different. I think and feel differently. I emote differently. So much more. Anyway, about 2 and a half years ago we had to take the Meyer’s Briggs tests at work. Mine was an INFJ. Didn’t think much about it until recently I began to delve into the idiosyncrasies of the stereotypical personality types and behaviors of the INFJ. Even reading your post, as I went I had an inner dialogue, oh that makes some sense but what about this, oh well, that makes sense. Oh that doesn’t seem right, no, wait, oh I understand. Sorry. Anyway, I’m off to read the more comprehensive, mind-numbing, eye-glazing, drool – inducing article you referenced. Thanks!

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  15. Thank you for this, I have read a lot of INFJ material in the last many years. I tested INFJ over 10 years ago and have never had another result. I appreciate the part about not being able to turn it off (the empathic quality). I find that I have certain body signals when it gets to be too much and I have to pay attention to that. Also speaking to our evil potential. It is very true and we need to pay attention to our capability for harm.

    One thing I learned many years ago is that people don’t know themselves that well. So they can be projecting something all over the place and you have to be very cautious about referring to it because it could be totally unconscious to them. Makes for a bit of lonely,

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  16. Thank you so much for this article! I am an INTJ and my wife is an INFJ, which has often caused clashes due to our differences. Your article has helped me get a better understanding of what is going on with her and how to be a better partner for her overall.

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  17. I used to wonder why I was the only one among friends who hated competition , would rather speak the truth than lie to fit in , and the one who believed in honour and correct conduct no matter how pulled in the wrong direction you felt , I would protect the underdog no matter what ,but when I was the underdog which was a lot I was all ways shoved to the back of the line and left , I always felt no one respected me but everyone always wanted my advice , my truest friends are all fictional but for some reason feel more real than anyone , I never felt more at home than when I was walking alone down the beautiful canal path , going to the cinema alone is the best , eating alone feels cool , but I love socialising I can talk to anyone about almost anything I don’t so much understand what’s being said as understand what’s being felt , but I can only do people for so long , I find myself agreeing with things I hate just to save confrontation , then I feel like a coward and false for not saying what’s truly in my heart , I have wrote lots of philosophy , one of my favourites sayings I wrote is except what’s not reject able and reject what’s not except able , when I was young I used to watch violent films from time to time can’t anymore at all I hate gangster films now I used to like them now I see them as idiotic humans acting like animals , I hate the news because all it talks about is mans failings when I believe mans successes are far more if only we could be told , but I must say I love life love this beautiful planet which I call the blue hill, love is the best and only thing a yuman being needs ,am I an Infj I always knew I was different but I thought maybe I’m just evolving into what we are all meant to be a true yuman being its just I’m evolving a little faster who knows .

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  18. I always thought something was wrong with me until I discovered there are others like me. This is such an accurate description! Thank you so much.

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  19. I always thought there was something wrong with me until I discovered there were others like me. This is such an accurate description! Thank you so much.

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  20. That last line just about had me in tears. I wish I’d had the benefit of knowing I was INFJ sooner.
    It’s been a profound and enlightening experience though, unwrapping the complexities of my personality.
    Thanks for a great article, it’s insightful and balanced.

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  21. One of the things that I think should be mentioned is that sadly, INFJs provide the biggest attraction for narcissistic personalities because we are that which they are missing in their internal make-up and so there are many INFJs out there who have been devastated to find themselves inside of such a relationship. I find this paradox confusing for, as an INFJ, I do have pretty reliable “reads” on people and yet, we can be duped by this deceptive personality type? I do not have enough experience with the technical understanding of the type to be able to truly understand this so if there are other INFJs who can explain it for me, I would greatly appreciate learning from your wisdom.

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    1. I can say that I felt drawn (still do) to people who are emotionally broken. A narcissist will share terrible childhood memories and stories of being treating unjustly (some are distorted or outright lies) simply to involve our emotions and draw us in. In my experience, my ex made me feel like he couldn’t function without me. According to him I brought into our relationship the stability and love he’d always craved. He mirrored me so well and seemed to be my soul mate. But as the relationship progressed and I questioned things that didn’t make sense, he would get upset and shut down. That should’ve been my cue to get out, but by then I was so emotionally invested and hopeful that I could help him overcome his traumatic past. Needless to say, I was no longer the same person I was when we met. I was shattered. Looking back, I can say that I chose to ignore what my Ni was picking up on, and my emotional and physical health suffered because of it. I learned that I didn’t have healthy boundaries to begin with and that’s something I continue to work on. Narcissists look for those who have little to no boundaries, because that means less work on their part in dominating and controlling you. Then again there may be some out there who like a challenge.
      Moral of the story: Have good boundaries, and listen to your Ni before you get emotionally involved.

      Reply

    2. Jan,
      This is so very true. I am an INFJ who was sucked into a relationship with a sociopath for six years and it truly is devastating. Thankfully, I am back on my feet and stronger than ever, though it was touch and go for a while. There is a very astute article called, “The INFJ and the Toxic Narcissist” out there which resonated with me. As part of my own recovery, I find I isolate myself and have become cautious to the extreme about anyone I let into my space. My door closings and slams are much more frequent. It seems as if I have become even more sensitive to other people’s emotions, so I am careful where I go. True sociopaths are terrifying people and, as a less cautious and unaware INFJ, he strategically, slowly pushed those solid ‘I hate a fucking liar’ boundaries back, skillfully playing to my ‘Do the right thing’ to his advantage. It has been my life long experience that such disordered personalities are attracted to us like moths to a flame. As an admin to a closed support group for those who have been in relationships with such…”people”…I am stunned at the amount of INFJ’s in the group.

      Reply

  22. It’s pretty scary how accurate this is. I’ve never really noticed how I tend to just pick up on people’s emotions, but after reading this I’ve been able to look back and realize several times just this day that I’ve ‘absorbed’ the emotions of others. It’s really interesting, and I’m glad there are other people out there that are actually like me and can understand how I feel

    Reply

  23. This made want to cry, thank you so so so much for this. I feel a little less misunderstood and I would like to send you a virtual hug. I hope you have a wonderful day, but if you dont thats okay, its what tomorrows are for.

    Reply

  24. I loved this article. Like many others commenting here, taking the Meyers Briggs Type Indicator was eye opening for me. It’s always nice to discover you’re not crazy, or alone.
    (I loved the video game analogy, and the Final Fantasy screen shot. I tried Summoner, and even Scholar, but settled on White Mage for heals and Bard for DPS.)

    Reply

  25. Decades ago, I took the MBTI and it came up as an ENTJ. That never seemed right to me but at the time my boss thought it was great! Forty years later, back to my home state and recovering from a bad divorce, I took the test again through an online site. Much to my surprise, a real awakening to come up as an INFJ. As I read through all that, I could see this is who I’ve been all my life but was so successful in mirroring that I rose to whatever challenge came up. Still, that life view had never felt right and this proved that, always the outsider pretty much from birth.
    Last year I took another test on Pinterest and it said I am 46% INFJ, 44% INFP and remainder % other types. This test link puts me barely over into the INFP, then into INFJ. I’ve wondered about this before and can see how it is so close at times. Your explanation had me agreeing left and right, so I thank you for such a detailed article that further encourages me to pursue my life’s work: the study of human behavior and how I can help people. As a life long volunteer leading and helping people, it’s time to follow another path as I’ve studied people my whole life! There is so much more realization and purpose now that I understand it better.
    Also, I can echo wholeheartedly the comments above by Cindy Roett, I am wiser, more confident person in dealing with toxic people in my world (at last)!

    Reply

  26. Ho-ly Shit. I have now bookmarked this page to be used as an introduction to me, for anyone that wants to know. Scratch that. For the people who *I decide* I want to know me. I have never read a more accurate description and I’ve read *lots* of INFJ descriptions. Things that stood out: First, we are often described as “nice” everywhere online and “saving the world” etc– yes, both true about me. But I am also a major asshole, for the reasons explained above. And highly judgmental about people (often without them having any clue). And I’m more often that not, right about said judgments. Another thing: I think different people I know have completely different views of me. Very few people really know me and I am very okay with that. Several colleagues see me as ice cold on the outside, I’m sure, for example. A time and energy saver for me which is great. Being popular drains my battery. I learned that early on when I was always the “life of the party” as a kid. So I learned to be the queen of the disappearing act as an adult. Mysterious extroverted me, no one can ever locate me! *poof* I’m suddenly gone! But I always let the important people know where I am and what I’m up to…. the few, the privileged. There are not many. And I am all about the emotional connection and the exchanges of deep meaningful ideas (as deep as humanly possible), one-on-one. With the people I select, that is. Again, I am an asshole. I tacitly decide who’s worthy. The only thing that didn’t ring true for me in this description is that we are “highly sensitive to mockery and rejection.” Not true for me. In fact, I even enjoy mocking myself. And when I’m rejected or mocked by someone, it simply makes me more curious about them. What exactly, in me, has triggered their rejection? It likely says more about them, then it does about me. I find it fascinating.

    Reply

    1. Thanks for your reply Sabia and your accolades. It means a lot to me.

      I should clarify that when I say INFJs are sensitive to mockery and rejection, I mean in the (rare) context where the INFJ decides to open up and be vulnerable around someone.

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  27. Excellent piece – and I liked the “door slam” – once you piss off an INFJ, it is closed and generally closed for good. Mystique is a good way to look at it because we can blend with just about anyone. I find that when someone becomes too much of an energy drain, critical, or negative to be around — (rather than supportive) that is when the door slam comes. We will give our best and deepest, but if constantly criticized or beaten down – will eventually slam that door with a thump!

    Reply

  28. This post is EXCELLENT. It is so spot on. I am curious to know how you became so intimately familiar with the type? Reading this post makes me a little afraid of my negative potential! But seriously, thank you so much for writing this.

    Reply

    1. Thanks, I couldn’t really say lol. I’m sure with enough effort, I could probably go into this level of depth about any type (which is one of my goals with this blog) but understanding INFJs is made just a bit easier by being an intuitive feeler myself.

      Reply

  29. Wow! This is so spot on! I recently learned I was this..mind blowing how it explains so many things that have happened in my life, but had no way to define it. Meyers-Briggs changed my life. I am more empowered now knowing of these gifts and to protect myself (healthy boundaries).

    omg…the insecurities and fears in others, can turn to be so detrimental, as it then gets directed at me. Everyone who projects and acts out are in the need of healing, plain and simple and that is how i see ppl – I honestly approach people without judgement, because I know how it feels to be on the receiving end of judgement, especially when they know NOTHING of my situation. Wonderful post. 😀

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  30. Great post! 🙂 I’ve recently been reading about the MBTI after taking the test and getting INFJ. I usually don’t like talking about myself, but I find that I enjoy reading posts about my type.
    It just gives me comfort in knowing that I’m not the only one doing the things that I do, and that these things can actually be articulated/explained. 🙂

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  31. I took the MBTI 4 times, each time INFJ. Spotting fakes a mile away. Wow. This personality description nails me to a “T”. I struggle with holding my tongue when I spot a fake. This personality trait is a double edged sword which has cut me often. Thanks guys for the info.

    Reply

  32. Thank you for understanding. It’s not exactly the validation.. but more of , wow, so this is what it is … in words. Also, so glad to see many others commenting.

    Love x

    Reply

  33. Thank you for this article! I was the type of person you mentioned in the beginning. In had never heard of the Myers Briggs test until my boyfriend suggested I take it, and received INFJ off the bat. It was such a relief to read all about this type and finally understand some of my quirks (both good and bad). Thank you specifically for going into INFJ anger. I feel like we tend to be painted as perfect angels who could do no wrong, but I don’t believe that’s the case. This was a very well-written piece!

    Reply

  34. Hi. Thanks for the article. I just wanted to add another perspective here since I hear people contrasting INFJ 4w3 with INFJ 4w5. Well I happen a third type: INFJ 5w4. I think using the enneagram along with mbti can be helpful for many reasons, but first I want to commend you in writing the article in the way you have. I think you try and be objective towards the type while many people seem to want to paint INFJs as angels. Also, the 4w5 is likely the classic INFJ type and so I don’t think I need to elaborate anymore on what you have described here. As for the 4w3 descriptions, I just don’t know, this does not click with Ni dominant for me. That, however, is beyond my experience and not something I will comment on.

    Anyway on to INFJ 5w4. Being a 5w4 means that I have a very strong introverted thinking side which I actually present to the world when making decisions. At a young age I had slightly more extraverted feeling in my outward portrayal, but I found this to be easily taken advantage of and so I usually present a very detached INTP-like vibe when interacting with others, but with a warmth that is fleeting and only something an INFJ could offer. To me Fe is synonymous with personal expression. My Fe does not seek myriad relationships with other people. It does not seek to be anything more than kind and friendly to passerby people when in the outside world. My Fe only truly presents itself when I sit down to write: poetry, music, an article. Since Fe is the functional opposite of Ti, it seems that it would be impossible to use both at the same time. So, I find that I like to pick apart the environment around me before I actually feel it. This is partially an Ni thing, but the fact that subjective analysis (Ti) precedes in the moment feeling (Fe) for myself means that I am even less likely than the INFJ 4w5 to take direct scheduled actions in the outer world. In a sense what I experience is the feeling of the moment post breaking it down and understanding it, and then making it palpable to myself by expressing it through some artistic medium. This was not something I was able to accomplish at a younger age when I had little ability to control the Ni-Ti loop, but now I actively embrace a lifestyle of using Ni and Ti and using a very specific Fe that is fairly small in its scope and does just enough to get the job done so I can slide back into my head and keep breaking things down and analzying them.

    These things make me quite a bit more detached, cold, and introverted than the INFJ 4w3 and even INFJ 4w5. In many ways I feel more like an INTJ, whose enneagram is always 5w4 or 5w6. I rarely make a decision that is not logical and find it easy to detach myself from my emotions. Yet, they are how I experience the world in the present moment and so they become pivotal for me to live. I am firmly on the Fe/Ti axis, despite my general dislike for actually experiencing and living in a world of other’s feelings. The dilemma of the INFJ 5w4 is finding a way to minimize the experience of the feelings in the moment so that the world may be analyzed as if from the perspective of an INTP and then dealt with through a dynamic form of personal expression. This allows me to live a very cold, detached, and reclusive life that allows me to understand the environment around me in a great level that an INTJ 5w4 likely could not even, and still leave room for expressing my feelings.

    Reply

      1. Ah that’s quite fascinating. Would be interested to learn about his/her experience. For me the art doesn’t stray too much from what you might expect from an INFJ 4w5. The thing is, though, is that it’s more of an outlet as opposed to a form of experience of the world if that makes sense. I also think that it might be a little more Ni heavy. A lot of what I will write comes from being in an intense trance state of sorts where I’m grappling with the definiteness of things around me. Depersonalization and my expression experience can go hand in hand. A lot of it comes from dreams. The expression is still through Fe but it is less what I feel and more what I am conscious is being felt and from there I’ll look back at it with my Ti hat on to get a better understanding of what was flowing out. If you’re at all interested I could send you a poem or two privately and I’m confident the Fe will be visible, just maybe less emotionally perceptible. Creating things like this, though, allows me to not have to deal with emotions in the rest of my life for the most part and go on writing very Ti heavy documents or do things such as solving intricate math problems. The same functions really can be quite dynamic!

  35. This speaks to my soul. I’m a genuine INFJ, and I long for that deep, emotional intimacy. Some of the closest people to me don’t understand me at all—and worse, don’t even try—so it feels isolating. I often wish I could let other people into my head so they could understand what it’s like.

    Reply

  36. As an INFJ I 100% agree with everything in this article! You even said some things that Ive been thinking about myself Iike the mirroring thing that I just recently realized I do with people in a one on one setting, it’s almost like I lock onto the energy of another person and we get into a groove that mirrors each other and I know that they can feel that I’m really getting them. It’s nice to have someone really get me tho with this article. The first time I took the mbti test in the description it said infjs are so complex that they don’t even understand themselves and I said yep that’s exactly it, you brought to light some more layers that I hadn’t previously been able to put into words. Thank you.

    Reply

    1. There’s actually more to that, something actors do called “introjection” in which the mirroring is taken one step further and the INFJ is able to get not only imitate someone else, but also get into their minds. In this way, the INFJ can sort of borrow traits from someone else, but in a far more self aware and less superficial way than an INFP.

      I think you might be describing introjection.

      Reply

  37. Thanks for writing this blog, it’s nice to be understood sometimes.

    It was in January that I took my first MB test after stumbling upon it from a google search. I got the INFJ result and thought, well that’s nice, what does it mean? Once I read the summary my initial reaction was ” Oh crap! That figures that I’d end up being one of the one percent. Darn! ” It’s been a learning experience and one that has made me better off despite my initial reaction. I only wish I knew about it when I was younger, because it explains so many things.

    Reply

  38. Hi there – a really well written article with the strength of drama a good writer needs to grab an audience’s attention – and I suspect therefore very INFJ ! 🙂 Years ago I took an MBTI test and was categorised as INFP which I thought was right and so labelled myself as that for the next 20+ years. This year I attended an MBTI Training course run by CPP (the official MBTI managers) and was revealed as an INFJ. Unpacking around that showed that I had been mistyped all these years. One of the main differences is the fact that INFJ’s don’t like surprises. Any unscheduled event can throw us. Also here’s a question for your readers? What do you do when you are stressed? For those of you inflicted with anxiety stemming for most of us from our childhood, do you do what I do and go into a cleaning frenzy while you mentally run videos in your head as to the range of negative outcomes you can foresee driving your anxiety exponential so that your amygdala is pumping adrenalin at full tilt. And then at some point you collapse as your turn your anger inwards toward yourself rather than run the risk of the god forbid event that you might hurt someone and therefore ultimately yourself? This clinched my realisation of being mistyped as a “P” when I have always been an INFJ. If I had been an INFP I would less likely stress this way. I would most probably go with the flow and perhaps have an outburst and the let it go? Then again how would I know – I’m after all just an INFJ… 🙂

    Reply

    1. Holy crap, that meltdown description was absolutely bang-on. I clean like a dervish when I’m anxious, like if I can just put order back to inanimate things, it will reorder the emotional stuff I can’t get a handle on.

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  39. So I’m more of an infj than a infp. But I’m constantly depending on the person, situation, what mood I’m in. Flipping back and forth between infj thought or feeling or info thought feeling. Obviously more infj. Sometimes I sense things more, sometimes before I run into them, sometimes when I run into them and also the people I’m closest with even when I haven’t seen them in weeks. As an example most of the time when I dream about people I care about I know to call them because something’s going on with them. Sometimes I don’t sense and it’s more logical by reading their body language. Or facial features, sound in there voice or words the use. You see the real them not just what there putting on the surface.It’s just weird with me you never know.

    Reply

  40. I am an INFJ to the tee. I have read so many articles on the type, to see if I really am one of the elusive infj, and it’s all like they are all talking about me, it speaks to me. It is all spot on describing me and before this test, I always felt like an there was something wrong with me until I found out that I am an INFJ.

    Reply

  41. Please stop glorifying avoidance, dependent, dissociative personality disorders and narcotization, harmony-seeking over identity-establishing; especially dangerous for type 9s. Glorying delusions and neuroses isn’t loving, but enabling.

    I’m ENTp-ILE-Ti sx/so. My confidence that INFJs do not have, will come across as arrogance. But let this, seemingly, arrogant fella show some humility. There is no type with more potential than the INFJ; especially Nines. None. Not mine. But glorifying Erickson’s Identity Confusion, narcotization, and introjection that’s responsible for chameleonism is, quite, Ego-protectionism and Self-defeatism. To APPEAR as another type due to a lack of introspection (which Ni sux at; while actually being the best function in perceiving others), is just damn dangerous and could feed delusions that increase along the 9-6-3 disintegrative pathway. None of us, including INFJs doubt their Fe capabilities. No one doubts the beauty of the idealism of love. But this harmony-seeking of Fe over truth-seeking of Ti within INFJs, responsible for the beauty and inspiration found in my heroes–INFJs Gandhi and Jesus–leads, only, to a downward spiral that breaks my damn heart.

    Reply

    1. I don’t know that there was any overt glorification of these very negative attributes and neutral attributes which you’ve assigned negative value to (harmony over identity establishment?? Why is this bad?)

      INFJs have weaknesses for sure but I’m enabling them somehow? As though being an INFJ were like having a drug addiction or something.

      Yes, I can see the lack of introspection. I could write volumes on unhealthy reliance on shadow functions and the critical parent nature of Fi when introspection is attempted. But if you want to get technical about it, it’s kind of like you using Te deductive reasoning…which ends up making you overtly cynical contrary to the open mindedness of Ne.

      My point is, we all suck at some things. INFJs are no exception. It’s kind of unfair to conflate their weaknesses into something “dangerous” since that could be true for any type. Personally, I’m exceptionally fond of INFJ strengths and prejudiced in their favor when it comes to their weaknesses but I think it’s understandable why. Often called the “the rational feelers”, they naturally temper idealistic notions with the balance of reason. They give voice to Fi sentiment having some personal albeit unhealthy understanding of it. That “weakness” is precisely what makes them such great counselors. Fe is only part of that equation.

      I don’t know why Introjection is inherently bad. It’s what actors do. It’s simply borrowing from someone else for artistic or other purposes. Maybe they even incorporate some of that into their very being. Who cares?

      The chameleon effect i described isn’t quite as literal as it sounds off the cuff in my article. INFJs by and large retain their same general persona no matter who they are around and they’re not willing to go so far as to lie or be insincere in order to seek harmony. That’s not even necessary. As for ego protectionism, what ego exactly? INFJs have somewhat of an ego but it’s developed mostly just for harmony purposes while the true self is carefully nurtured and its integrity tested. They’re not in the habit of lying to themselves.

      Also, I find it rich coming from an ENTP. I don’t know you personally but I’ve known some ENTPs and they seem to be the most egotistical, self aggrandizing bunch with a penchant for materialism, nihilism, and ego bolstering status climbing. I don’t think I’ve ever seen any other type brag with such gusto about their own awesomeness.

      Reply

  42. Well, took the embedded test just to be sure and came up 82% INFJ. This was an interesting article especially for having the courage to tackle the negatives of the type. We’re rare and hard to understand. Until I did the MB several times and kept typing out INFJ (and then learned what that means), I was firmly convinced that there was something seriously wrong with me, LOL. I’m just waaaay different and if I’m smart, I do what I need to in order to work with those differences.

    Reply

  43. So tired of these tests and such. I am an INFJ, if you think otherwise then oh well, kiss my ass. Another paradox about myself is that I am a mastered degreed engineer. I should be a poet or a writer. No as an engineer, I have a people job first, technical job second. This is my advice, take the test once as fast as you can and whatever results you get is what you are. Because after the first time you take that test, You can answer those questions and be any personality type you want. God bless!

    Reply

  44. Thank you for this post. I found out in highschool that I am an INFJ which didn’t mean much to me then, but as an adult, it means so much more. No matter how we mirror other personalities, we also tend to be alphas and leaders in any one setting. Soft spoken, observatory, and constantly underestimated…we are the essence of grace and power. Love being an INFJ!

    Reply

  45. Thank you, thank you, thank you for your well-crafted article (and the embedded article and quiz)! I was surprised by having a great feeling of relief after reading it- it’s very rare for me to feel understood.

    “Emotional sponge” is great! My husband calls it my “Emotional Velcro”.

    Also, this INFJ is an engineer, too.

    Reply

  46. This is so informative. I still don’t know if I’m truly an INTJ or INFJ as I score back and forth between the two, but so many things in this are relatable for me. Fascinating!

    Reply

  47. Thanks for the article and for pointing out the darker side also. I did not initially identify as an INFJ because of the drippy sweet superficial descriptions on most websites. It was only after taking a hard look at cognitive functions that I realized how much the INFJ pattern fits me.

    Reply

    1. That’s funny JR because I thought this article was pretty flattering to INFJs. I’ve recently been told that it was a “mighty high pedestal”. I don’t think that’s entirely fair since INFJs are clearly human and when I write about any type, I dig so deep into the paradoxes that each person can not only identify with the specific complexites but also to some extent feel special.

      Reply

  48. Amazing article. Thanks for sharing.
    This is EXACTLY me. Sadly.
    For me it has not been easy to be an INFJ. Hardly fit anywhere and with anyone, even though I am the perfect chameleon. Tired of that too.

    Reply

  49. Thank you so much for the article and your generous responses to comments. I’ve tested as an INFJ since the early ’90’s, but I keep learning from this and accepting some preferences instead of fighting to overcome them. For instance – I’ve only recently come to understand my need for being alone and how it recharges my batteries after a full week of work. I used to worry about not being able to meet others’ expectations for weekend activities – ALL weekend long. Now I feel empowered knowing that reading and writing and watching movies or TV feed my creativity. All that mirroring and feeling the feels of others is just exhausting. I have to do something to fill the well back up again. Thanks again for choosing INFJs to write about! You’ve helped me remember that I’m in a good place! 💚

    Reply

  50. That was a very good and accurate description. You have it pegged to a T.

    I am older, late 50s, and have lived a difficult life so many of the INFJ/s more negative traits have been springing up as I get older. I am emotionally exhausted and find that I do turn off the empathy now. I reserve my empathy for a very select few. It is odd (kind of scary) as I feel so cold and heartless now compared to the person I was when younger but it really is necessary to keep me from going over the deep end. I turn off the empathy by deliberate action. I pretend to listen but put up a wall and deliberately send my mind elsewhere, such as a grocery list, to keep my mind from drifting empathic as so much hurt invades when I don’t block it out. If the wall drops or I forget to put it up then I am consumed by the deepest ache from other’s pain. I find more internal anger toward those that abuse me, maybe because the wisdom with age allows me to see it ever clearer and it exhausts me. I find curse words raging freely now through my mind and in my journal where I never cursed when younger. I would love to read a good article regarding INFJ’s type transition into the older years – especially when they are plagued with physical or emotional pain. People see INFJs as flower love child frollicking poets (that was never me). Life happens though. Maybe many stay that way but I’d be willing to bet that I am not alone. A lifetime of empathy, deep feeling, reading people and always looking for their ulterior motive, giving and not receiving, is exhausting. I saw where INFJs were old for their years so what about when INFJs actually become older? I lived a life of patience. I was the classic ‘eat all the food on your plate that you don’t like to save the best for last’. Somehow I had that approach to life, to be patient, see the big picture and in the end will be the best. So, there comes a point where you can’t lie to yourself even in your fantastical daydreams. There is no dessert coming. All those years of being patient, loving, giving and being a good sport and there is no dessert. There is no friggin’ dessert.

    Sorry my post is such a downer. I am trying to reflect, to people who may actually give a crap to know these things, that personality types do morph with age. And also, that INFJs are not always able to exit stage right to a secluded room and so some of us do develop the skill to turn off empathy. I can’t turn it off if I am genuinely listening but I can pretend to listen in order to turn it off.

    I would love to be directed to a resource that discusses this further. I guess I am curious if I am an outlier or if other INFJs go through this too.

    Reply

  51. I loved the test specifically for INFP v INFJ. Im not overly familiar with mbti, and have struggled sorting it out. I am INFJ, but barely. So, given the differences here, what would an INF* be like?

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  52. Amazingly insightful article. I’ve tested as both INFJ and INFP, which I guess is common. I’m a very flighty, forgetful and spontaneous ‘J’ type. I think what leads me to believe that i’m truly INFJ is the people component. Absorbing emotions, seeing into souls, caring way too much, exhausting myself to make everyone else ‘ok’. Also, while I feel a kinship with INFP’S I tend to find them and their poetic expression….self- indulgent. INFJs love beauty and art but it has to serve a purpose, if that makes sense. INFP’S are arty and elusive, which INFJS can certainly be- but our artistic expression takes on more practical application. I write to inspire. An INFP will write for self- expression.

    Reply

  53. Hi Rebecca. Without knowing or caring much about the theory I’ve done MBTI three times in the last few years. I was interested in test/retest reliability, and used different sites, with different question sets. Each time, INF were all solid at ~75%, but J less certain at ~53%. So thanks for the link to the micro test. With another set of questions that I don’t recall from the previous tests, I tested INFP 47% | 53% INFJ. Seems pretty reliable in my case, at least. Whether what MBTI claims to reveal about a person is of fundamental importance is another matter.

    Reply

  54. Love this aeticle and how brief t is, explaining everything. I’m an INFJ and I’m sort of obsessed with reading all articlea about my type and this is all so true. I resonate with this so much. Brilliant.

    Reply

  55. Thank you for this article. I read a lot of articles on the infj personality, this one really resonated with me. I was laughing and actually got emotional by the end. I say all the time, and I’m the asshole!

    Reply

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